Tummy Tukwila

It's not Tukwila, and it's not a weekday, but I just had to write about it... While in Phoenix yesterday, my dear friend La Cobra took me to the best Mexican supermarket... ever, Ranch Market . It was much like Seattle's Uwajimaya , with a huge food court, billions of food items that one can only guess at their contents, and a enormous butcher area filled with stacks of red meat, animal body parts - even the occasional animal face. It really was a wonderland, and La Cobra was a perfect guide to lead me to the section of the market that had about 15 different selections of fruit juice and horchata. After having a horchata and getting lost in the piles of chiles and fresh tortillas, La Cobra and I decided to head out for Mexican food at a place down the road. The name of it.. can't remember, but the food was delicious and the decor - kitschy. I had the veggie burrito, and La Cobra had enchiladas. We chowed our food while watching the Spanish version of "Epic Movie...

Since B is still out on vacation, and J and I have both had colds this past week, we decided it was a good time to try Old Saigon Pho in Southcenter's industrial park. I had a dish called "Vegetarian Delight" that was mostly comprised of cabbage and tofu swimming in a sad, watery, half-peppered sauce, floating around a bed of white rice. It was literally, the most depressing thing I've ever eaten. To make matters worse, it seemed that everything I touched had a sticky film - the salt shaker, the table, the ponzu bottle, the rooster sauce bottle, the backs of the fake flowers on our table, even some of the guests looked sticky. J had the "give me the cow" beef noodle pho which included a variety of cow bits in a steaming bowl of beef "from the can" broth. He seemed depressed as well. All of this had us wishing we had gone to Sizzler instead. To make up for all this sadness, a trip to Red Mango was in order. The fro yo with the Golden Grahams helped ...

While B is on vacation, and J lunches with some lady who usually stands him up (let's call her Little Miss Unreliable Lunch Date, or ULD for short), I decided to stay in, catch up on world news and eat some garlic water for lunch. Yes, it's the return of the Loneliest Lesbian Lunch: Trader Joe's garlic noodle soup... not nutritious, but semi-delicious anyway. I hope everyone else is enjoying an exciting lunch today.

B had lunch at Joey's with a colleague, MF (making her T2 debut) based on J's previous recommendation. The food was quite good, although a little pricy for lunch (especially in Tukwila). The highlight of the meal was the skinny fries; they are quite skinny and quite delicious. The other items that were quite skinny (and here, skinny translates into microscopic) were the outfits on the female employees. When I first walked in I thought I was at a strip club and was waiting for dance poles to descend from the ceiling at any minute. I swear it looked like the official Joey's uniform for females was purchased at "Whores R Us". YIKES! So if you've just been released from prison and haven't seen a woman in years, Joey's is your place. Be sure to bring plenty of one dollar bills. Food: 3.5/5 Good Times: 4/5 A modicum of dignity and class 1/5

...but you're still in Tukwila. Recently, the Compound replaced the carpet on the back-entrance staircase with this new, rubber-textured flooring. To make us all feel we're in the grand halls of the state capitol, they applied marble-esque tape along the edge (as seen here in this photo). At first, we all thought they had made a mistake and forgot to glue something down, but then we realized - as always, it was just the poor taste of the Compound's property management company. As weird as it looks, it won't be long before it's covered in filth and blends in with its surroundings. Speaking of blending... J and I went to Blue C today and everyone in the place looked like everyone else. I surmised that Blue C attracts a certain (high) class of people, J agreed. As usual - DeShawnda served us, and the food was excellent. Meanwhile, B is downtown hanging out with the Navy. I'm sure his blog will be more interesting than mine. Food: 5/5 Compound Atmosphere: -5/5 TGIF:...

Today, while B dined with the Power Womon , J and I ventured out of the Tukwila area for lunch at our favorite Mexican restaurant, Tacos Guaymas in White Center. Set in the center of downtown White Center, Guaymas offers authentic Mexican food, a deliciously fresh and interesting salsa bar (complete with limes and pickled radishes), horchata and Telemundo on the TVs that can be found in each of the two dining areas. Guaymas is perfect for cold, cloudy Seattle days like today. It's definitely on my comfort food list. Food: 5/5 Atmosphere: 3/5 (minus 2 points for feeling worried that I may end up in the crossfire of a drive-by while dining in White Center)

Adding to B's blog - - I had been to the Mongolian Grill a few years back, and I don't remember hearing Spirit 105.3 (local religious music channel) playing in the background, and definitely don't remember the painting depicting Jesus during one of his famous events on the wall near the cash register. Really... I felt like I was in Utah. Strange that going to the MGrill has become a religious occassion. Regardless, the food was okay, the service was headed up by a control freak and the atmosphere has seriously gone downhill. We'll get you for this J. Food 2/5 Atmosphere 1/5 Bitterness 5/5

J cheated on B and R. J reported that he'd be lunching with "another" at the Mongolian Grill in the Target Shopping Plaza (I just made up that name). B and R thought it would be humorous to drop in on the "secret luncheon rendezvous" to both enjoy some Mongolian style food—whatever that is— and to confront the infidelity. Adding insult to injury, J was not at the grill when B and R arrived. He and the other woman decided to eat at Joey’s at South Center instead. The Mongolian Grill is very “guy-centric”- R was the only woman there for quite a while. The fill-your-own bowl concept was entertaining, until the sauce making station. Big choices, with little instruction on making the perfect flavor composition. At this point, I just closed my eyes and hoped for the best. The result was slightly above average. The décor was lackluster, almost depressing even with the smiling faces of ancient Mongols painted on the wall. Who knew that camping could make someone so hap...

Today, J ditched B&R in favor of a special guest lunch star, Long Lost Friend. LLF pulled a fast one, initially selecting some scary Mongolian Grill as our lunch destination, then switching mid-drive to the new Joey's at none other than Westfield Shoppingtown Southcenter (B&R were not happy about LLF's choice--I'm sure there will be more details forthcoming). Joey's decor is a little overdone for the Southcenter lunch crowd--the place screamed "meat market" to J as soon as he entered the establishment. Satiny hostess stations, silky chairs, and velvety booths festoon the interior (and patio)--they look nice now, but will be totally skanky with ground-in body soil in a year. The "washrooms" were also a little strange. The men's room featured black and white checkered marble, smoked glass stall doors, and a wall-sized photo of a forest with urinals hanging from the trees. The wait staff was friendly, but awkward. The hostess was shiny and p...

"Have You Done the Belt? It's Dangerous!" We actually heard someone say that as they walked by our booth at Blue C today (sorry Unicorn Pony Dreamcatcher , Sizzler will have to wait for another day). They were referring to the conveyor belt style delivery of sushi that makes Blue C so great. And yes, it is dangerous: before your done with your first plate of self-served sushi, you're already reaching for the next. Before you know it - you've eaten 9 plates.... ahh , delicious danger! In other news, J has started carrying his camera case as a murse . A while back, B and J gave me puh - lenty of grief over the Italian leather satchel that I had started carrying around after a trip to Florence a couple of years back - "Hey look everyone, R's carrying a purse!" Whatev . At least J won't be able to make fun of me anymore... I'm bringing back the Euro-bag!  

Not much I can add to J's posting, except that while I really enjoyed my experience at Duke's, I was dismayed by the signs on the bathroom doors: Duke of Earl, and Duke of Earl's Girls (men's and women's bathroom respectively). Funny, but not. Happily, my soup and salad were the best I'd had in a very long time. Anyway - thanks for the suggestion meilee! Sizzler is next on the list. Food: 5/5 Atmoshphere: 4/5 (minus one point for sexist signage)

With B allegedly stuck in an unfortunate meeting, it was only R&J who were adventurous enough to take on a fan recommendation dare, and headed for lunch at Duke's Chowder House at Westfield Shoppingtown Southcenter. The anticipation upon entering the mall was palpable...what lay behind those blue doors--untold culinary delights or kitchen nightmares? R was struck by the decor, proclaiming the establishment "cute," though J, being fussy, was much harder to please. He found the atmosphere to be kitschy, but not unpleasant, and reminscent of the homes of Minnesota where he grew up, full of artfully placed fishing rods and tackle. Noticeably absent were the dead fish mounted on the wall, of which there were none at Duke's. R appreciated the plaid carpet; it made J feel like he was eating on a dog blanket. The waitstaff there was all female: clean, professionally dressed, and blandly hot in a women's volleyball team sort of way. They were quick to grind fresh peppe...

R&J will be making an appearance today around 12:45 at Duke's Chowder House at Westfield Shoppingtown Southcenter for a fan recommendation! If you can find us, we'll be signing autographs.

We had lunch with The Chef today. The Chef is queen of Foodland, and I was more than happy to comply when she requested that we eat at Taco Del Mar. Of all the delicious choices in the Tukwila area, TDM is possibly one of the tastiest, but of course you, and The Chef know this already. Speaking of queens: B sleuthed the location of the missing Taco Queen! Apparently, the Taco Queen has been on assignment in Bellevue, and will be returning to Tukwila in just a few more weeks! Check back on Friday afternoon when we critique Duke's Chowder House at the request of reader "meilee." Food: 5/5 (of course) Entertainment: 5/5 (thanks to Chef, and to B for figuring out where the Taco Queen had gone)

R fell in the air like a swan out of water lovely disaster.

Where in Tukwila should the T2 Team eat next? Give us your suggestion - we'll eat there and blog about it.

Yikes. There I was, casually walking out of the mall past some construction that was being doing on the floor, and WHAM! I nearly owned the mall. The tripping seemed to last forever. I remember thinking... when will it ever end? I tripped on some uneven flooring, kept on tripping, took out the "fencing" they had placed inside the hole in the floor, tripped some more, and then miraculously - I righted myself. With half the mall staring at me, all I could do was laugh myself silly. I never thought I would say this, but I blame a burrito. Today I ate at the new Mexican food restaurant, Sharky's in the Westfield food court. The burrito was like eating a gummy tortilla that had been stuffed with garbage disposal waste. I was sick to my stomach, and busy recovering from an awkward, scent-overkill stop with B and J at The Body Shop when the nearly-tragic event occurred. I was light-headed, nauseous, and vulnerable. I'm really just shocked that I didn't fall flat on my ...

I know it's unusual, and maybe even a bit on the unholy side, but B and I had lunch with the Bird Killer today at Taco Del Mar. Lunching with the enemy is not usually something I would even consider, however, we did get to ride in his so-called "premium-luxury sports car for young, aggressive males" although, the car was neither premium-luxury (I think that description expires after 10 years, BK), nor was he young and aggressive since he's pushing 40, and it took us 20 minutes to get back from the Southcenter area, which is usually only a 10 minute drive. He also demonstrated how to wrap a baby in the "Mummy Swaddle" using a bottle of hot sauce and a paper napkin, which was both weird and amusing. So at least lunchtime entertainment was different from the usual, and all of this makes for semi-interesting blog writing. The Taco Queen is still MIA, though we're starting to think she has been dethroned and a new, Evil Taco Queen is standing in her place. Al...

R and I had a highly memorable lunch today, not only because we visited Taco del Mar (I know, we’re stuck in a rut) for fish tacos, but more so for our lunch guest. New J or as I’ll call him, “the Birdman” joined us and provided significant levels of both entertainment and disbelief. Interesting tidbits: 1) We were driven to lunch in a 10 year old Audi A4 owned by Birdman that is frequently referred to by him as a “premium luxury sports car for young aggressive males”. The ride was not premium, luxury or aggressive—so much so that a colleague diving a 20 year old Mazda Protégé (with no brake lights) smoked us. 2) There’s a new Taco Queen in town, who I believe could win an extreme fighting match (against the men). She’s not messing around, so I highly recommend knowing your order in advance, speaking clearly and moving on to the next station in a quick and orderly fashion. Only make direct eye contact as a last resort. 3) The plates at TDM are apparently defective and do not work right...